You'll Shoot Your Eye Out

If you have ever seen the classic Christmas movie A Christmas Story, you will recognize that line as the response poor Ralphie gets the opportunity to tell any adult in his life what he wants for Christmas, his cherished Red Rider BB gun with a compass and a sundial in the stock.  The poor kid can't get a break.  Even Santa Claus tells him he will shoot his eye out.

The movie has been a favorite in my family for years, partly because it is such a nice, nostalgic story and partly because the protagonist Ralphie (portrayed by Peter Billingsley) bears a striking resemblance of my younger brother when he was that age.  There are so many scenes that are ingrained into my memory.  I don't know if it is a "guy" thing or not, but so many of my male friends and colleagues count it as their favorite Christmas movie.  I know it is mine.

I have a friend and colleague at the office who is about 18 years younger than I am.  He also is a big fan of the movie.  So much so that whenever one of us sees something at the store that is symbolic of scenes from the movie, out come the cell phone cameras and a quick text message is sent.  I have sent him miniature versions of the leg lamp, and earlier this year a Christmas stocking in the shape of that very same leg lamp.

The other day at work, it was his turn to send me something.  It was an email with a link to Amazon.com for the Christmas Story Red Ryder BB Gun boxer shorts you see pictured above, a pair of red boxers emblazoned with images of Ralphie, the BB Gun, and the quote "you'll shoot your eye out."  I love them.  I am seriously thinking of ordering myself a pair of them.  Of course being guys, we were just doubled over in laughter at the potential double entendre associated with boxers and "you'll shoot your eye out." Us guys can be so juvenile at times.

In addition to the Red Ryder BB Gun boxer shorts, they also had the Christmas Story It's a Major Award boxers shown here.  For those who have never seen the movie, Ralphie's father (the Old Man) entered a puzzle contest and was notified that he had won "a major award."  The crate arrived and after prying off the lid, out comes a life sized leg lamp clad in fishnet stockings.

That lamp was the focus of several funny scenes that culminated in Ralphie's mother "accidently" knocking over the lamp and breaking it into several pieces.  The Old Man was devastated at the loss of his greatest achievement, his major award.  While we didn't laugh quite as hard at the double entendre of a major award being on underwear, the thought was still there.